After watching an IONS event, I realized that what I experienced in 1992 was a SCE (Shared Crossing Experience), formerly referred to as a SDE (Shared Death Experience). I remember the year because I was pregnant with my first daughter. One of my favorite relatives, my grandfather, Papa, was in the hospital.
Before I left one evening I said “I’ll see you tomorrow,” and I basically forced him to agree with me. He did not seem to be on death’s door or anything, and none of the medical staff had indicated that the family should be saying goodbye or anything like that… yet I felt compelled to make him promise me.
That night while I was sleeping I felt a wave of energy pass through me. I said “Go back to the hospital,” because I knew it was him. The next morning when my mom called my grandmother, she said that Papa’s condition was “the same as last night.” I remember thinking “No, that’s not true. He’s dead.” But this was my mom’s sneaky white lie way of speaking. To her “same as last night” meant that he was dead — she wasn’t technically lying — she didn’t want to tell my grandmother until she had given her a Quaalude.
After that I remembered thinking “If this baby comes out with blue eyes, I will know it was really him.” (One time Papa told me the secret that he always wanted a child with blue eyes, and that I was his favorite. I feel it is okay to share this secret now, because I would love to offer hope and possibly lessened grief to others.) Well, my daughter came out with ONE blue eye.
According to author / researcher William J. Peters, what I experienced is a type of SCE/SDE called a fly-by / fleeting farewell.
Author William J. Peters has studied and categorized SDE’s and encourages us all to rethink death and dying. If you are interested in a better life and a better death, check out his book, full of research and powerful accounts of SDE’s. Truth be told, I didn’t buy this book YET (I’m just too excited about this I had to share), but I am tagging this post as a REVIEW never-the-less (I know this will be a GREAT book to read).
- Shared Crossing Project Website
- Share your SDE story
- Shared Crossing Intern Program
- Online Course: A Glimpse Beyond The Threshold: Shared Death Experiences:
- Shared Crossing Project Instagram
- Shared Crossing Project Facebook
- William’s author page
Connecting this to my work with Am-fullness
I pulled images from my book, with my thoughts as captions BELOW each pic. 🙂